Holiday Time

     So, I have been sitting for a while trying to think of what to put up here next since my last post. I'm still not sure what I'm going to end up putting here, actually, but I think that I'm just going to go ahead and type anyways.
     I don't like it when Christmas comes. Not sure why I'm starting up with this, but I guess that I just really want to say it. I like Christmas itself, yes, but the time before and after isn't very pleasant for me. Every year my mom makes plans to bake so many cookies and other fancy desserts we only really have a chance to have around this time of year. But she rarely ever makes them. Last year I don't think we made any cookies, and so far this year we haven't done anything either. I'm the one who made brownies a few days ago, as well as cinnamon buns a week or two ago. My mom's bought chocolate chips and peppermints to make peppermint bark, and every day she keeps saying that she'll make it, but it still hasn't happened. In the end, I'm probably going to end up making it for her since she's not going to want to do it. I'm really hoping that that isn't going to be the case, but with the way how she can't be bothered to bake even brownies I don't really have much hope. (For those wondering, my mom's been nagging me to make brownies for months now, and there are many times when she's said that if she had to make them then no one else would get, and I would've been fine with that. It's never worth it for me standing for an hour or two making the brownies and getting only two or three.)
     And the Christmas tree. We've had our fiber-optic Christmas tree for years now. I don't ever remember having a different tree, actually. Our tree is falling apart because it's that old, and every year my mom tries getting my dad to replace it, but when it comes to actually going out to get a new one, suddenly she doesn't want to. And every year I have to go and fluff out the branches because they get flattened because it goes and lies down on its side when it gets stored away, and because no one else can be bothered to do it. I would've been fine with that, I honestly would have. But when no one else wants to help even decorate the tree? That used to be something we all did a few years ago. Something we did together as a family. But now I'm the only one who seems to know how to put on the garlands and all the ornaments. I really don't understand how that happened.
     Outside decorations? Oh, we have plenty of them lying around, but they never get put up. We went and cleared out the garden of weeds (which my sister was already paid for, even though she never did it) in the freezing cold to put up decorations, and as of writing this we've only got icicle lights on the gutters and lights on the tree outside. Nothing else. Thankfully, I didn't have to help with actually doing any of that, but I was stuck for hours untangling all the lights because once again no one else can be bothered to do it. They don't seem to notice that I'm already busy with something else, and if I leave then I'm missing out on something important. No, I have to drop everything that second and go and do it for them. If I don't, then I start getting yelled at. Everyone goes and complains about how I never do anything, stuff gets taken away, and I end up feeling completely awful about myself even though it's not even my fault.
     But then, my family isn't exactly a nice family. My older sister can't seem to speak or ask nicely anymore and is always yelling and complaining and being simply nasty with everyone. She and my younger brother are almost always sitting on their computers. Neither of them get up half the time when they actually need to, and they don't know what's going on around them the majority of the time because they don't know how to pay attention to two things at the same time. My younger brother might not be as nasty as my sister, but he's got a naturally loud voice, and since he mostly yells I get tired of it very fast.
     I'm not even going to bother complaining about my mom here. It's just not worth it. But my two youngest siblings, I have a major issue with them. Or maybe I just have an issue with what they're learning from the rest of us. Anyways, they used to be so nice before. Cute and friendly like how I imagine little kids to be anyways. But lately they yell just as much as everyone else. My little brother is always nagging for something, and if he doesn't get what he wants then he starts screaming like a banshee. Actually, he just starts screaming whenever anything happens that he doesn't like. And he's also got a loud voice, and I'd say that a whistle in my ears would probably hurt less than him screaming across the room. And he hurts. He's gotten into the habit of punching someone whenever they've done something to upset him (or many times in my case, doing nothing at all and just simply being there) And for a little kid, he's pretty strong. Or maybe I'm just too skinny. Or something else. I don't know. All I know is that he's gotten to be very annoying. My little sister also screams like a banshee whenever something happens that she doesn't like, and also punches pretty hard for a little kid. And lately when they ask for Halloween candies (which only still remain because I've been keeping them in my room and I don't steal them, unlike my younger brother and older sister) or actually any kind of candies, they almost always end up getting. It doesn't matter if it's half an hour before their bedtime. It doesn't matter if they've already been bad enough not to deserve one. They just get what they want. As always. They are so spoiled that it isn't even funny. Most of the time the four older kids (my older brother, older sister, me, and my younger brother) end up eating sandwiches for lunch and dinner (except on some days when my mom actually bothers cooking something or gets me to cook something) It's not filling enough for us. We're still hungry afterwards, sometimes even after we've eaten two or three sandwiches. It's not filling for my little siblings either. But they get aall the 'fancy' meals. They get to eat pasta and frozen dinners and whatever else, but sandwiches? Oh no, that will never happen, simply because they get everything they want. They get all the ice cream they ask for, they get all the candy they ask for, they got to hog the tv whenever they want, they even get to use our computers even if we're busy with something important. But the rest of us? No, we had to grow up eating sandwiches, having extremely limited time on games and even tv, and having almost no desserts. It's not fair.
     But of course you'll never hear me say that out loud to my family. They'd only yell at me again. I've had enough of yelling to last me a lifetime, and still I have to sit with so much of it every day of my life.
     I have no complaints with my dad or older brother. My dad is actually trying to be nice, even if he's only home on the weekends and I rarely actually see him because we're both sitting the majority of the time in our separate rooms. And while I do get annoyed by my older brother talking so much about things I don't care about, at least he makes up for it with chocolates and actual advice and tips on some things. He's gotten me to play Minecraft, and while I still only know how to make a few actual things apart from tools and other sort of necessary survival items, I still enjoy playing with him. We built a huge tower the other day. That was fun. Until he ended up cheating. I don't like cheating. I don't like Creative mode (which I personally consider to be cheating) and I don't like anything else that gets you something faster than you would be able to. I actually enjoy chopping down forests of trees and digging out mountains to get the materials I need. I don't actually enjoy monsters killing me, but luckily there's peaceful mode for the world I'm trying to turn into something absolutely fantastic (not that I have any idea what I'll be making yet, but I've chopped down a large area of trees and have flattened a big hill so far and I'm under the process of expanding the flat area even more) and even though I encounter many skeletons and creepers (which are by far the most annoying monsters, aside from Ghasts, which are just plainly creepy with the sounds they make) I at least know how to kill them, and I don't freak out every time I see them, unlike my sister (Seriously, she jumps for just about anything)
     So there's no complaints on my brother there. He's the only actual one who's nice to me on a regular basis. He doesn't really complain about anything I do, except for the times when he's joking around about me being too awesome. But he somehow manages to make me feel better whenever I'm upset (which is a lot) even if he doesn't realize it. Sometimes it seems like he's the only one who actually cares. Everyone else only gets concerned about me whenever I'm ready to ignore everyone and keep pushing them away, but my brother is the only one who actually sticks around to try and help basically the entire time and not just during those times.
     I suppose that's it for now. Once I started typing, I knew exactly what I wanted to say, but now it seems that I've run out of words. And while I don't actually feel better, I think it has helped me that I've been able to vent out some of my feelings. And I don't think that this is the last time I'll be complaining about my family. They're just that annoying to me.